All posts by Clyde Thornhill

  • redneck
    REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Dickens of a redneck Christmas

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – After a strenuous day of Christmas shopping, I was relaxing at the trailer with a case of Budweiser, some pork rinds, and the TV clicker. I already had gifts for all my girls:...

    • Posted December 17, 2013
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  • redneck
    REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Are hunters Nazis or Klansman?

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – After reading News&Guide editorials for the last month, I find myself in the midst of an identity crisis. Am I a Nazi or a member of the Klan? It was suggested by Todd...

    • Posted December 3, 2013
    • 2
  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Thornhill: Breaking yoga

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – I’m sitting in my office smoking cigarettes between shots of cheap bourbon and bad memories. Velda ran off with a sponsored snowboarder and the promise of a free Burton board. I feel empty,...

    • Posted November 19, 2013
    • 1
  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Hog Island Physics Require Quantum Leap

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – Normal people are often intimidated by physics and quantum theory. After all, Albert Einstein’s appearance does not bolster confidence in his ability to discern universal truths. I have decided to provide an explanation...

    • Posted November 5, 2013
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Clyde strayed, only pieces found

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – In honor of “Wild” author Cheryl Strayed appearing at “Page to the Podium,” I offer a column that appeared two years ago when her book was the latest in the confused-female-finding-herself-in-nature genre. Her...

    • Posted October 22, 2013
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Slow Food, fast women

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – Disheartened by the Washington D.C. car chase and shooting, I stopped by Shades with hopes that Susie would offer emotional support by way of a free day-old muffin. It was very tragic that a...

    • Posted October 8, 2013
    • 1
  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Milking the Frappuccino culture

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – Alice, my Republican lover, wanted to meet at the new Starbucks. Personally, I miss the pre-Starbucks-Seattle-Microsoft era. You could buy a cup of coffee for fifty cents and no one even considered putting...

    • Posted September 24, 2013
    • 1
  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Hedging life’s real risks

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – Blythe Winters-Paulson, vice president of ethics for Goldman Sachs, and for whom I served as a mastress, (a male mistress) spent some time at her home in Teton Pines last week. Her days...

    • Posted September 10, 2013
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Fishin’ for votes in hot water

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – Alice was in an angry mood when she stopped by my trailer last night. She is often angry, as she is, after all, a Republican. She once expressed her fury with a fervent display...

    • Posted August 27, 2013
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Hog Island think tank swimmin’

    JACKSON HOLE, WYO – I swung by Shades just as they were closing for the day, the best time to snag free muffins. Shades will sell today’s muffins tomorrow as day-olds as their monetary basis, if viewed through...

    • Posted August 13, 2013
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