All posts by Clyde Thornhill

  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: The Emperor’s New Truck

    JACKSON HOLE, WY – Politicians and others eager to attach themselves to the new Hog Island mayor, Ndogo Uume, attended his inauguration. The spokesman for the “National Society of Earth is Supported on the Back of a...

    • Posted January 17, 2017
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: A Classy Christmas

    A Classy Christmas Twas the night Before Christmas When all through the trailer The girls were drinking Shots as if sailors Alice’s stockings were silk Black and lacy Her skirt rode high It was really quite racy...

    • Posted December 20, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Free Speech Protectors

    Hog Island defends the First Amendment. JACKSON HOLE, WY – A battle is brewing between Hog Island Mayor-elect Ndogo Uume and community members over civil liberties. The mayor-elect recently tweeted that he favored revoking Hog Island citizenship...

    • Posted December 13, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: CSI Hog Island

    Investigating a crime of the worst kind. JACKSON HOLE, WY – I received a call from Hog Island Trailer No. 35 about a possible 537, a.k.a.: a crime involving swine. I pulled up with the team in...

    • Posted November 29, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: The Trump Tirade

    We must not assume the traits we condemn. JACKSON HOLE, WY – A preacher was tired of the morally superior tone of his congregation. He told them, “If there was a drunken orgy in town, I would...

    • Posted November 22, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Serious Endorsements

    JACKSON HOLE, WY – Susie stopped by my trailer last week with her latest toy purchase from the Xccessories Closet at Ella’s Room. “What candidates are you endorsing in your column?” she asked while I rewired a...

    • Posted November 1, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: The Fight Is On

    Race for Hog Island mayor is wrought with scandals. JACKSON HOLE, WY – Hog Island’s mayoral race is down to two people, and it is turning into an ugly campaign. Lorna Doon won the August primary with 35...

    • Posted October 18, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Strange Things Done in the Midnight Sun…

    A poem by Clyde Thornhill. There are strange things done In the land of fun By those who make the scene. The baristas in the latté stores Wear black, silky drawers And is a snowboarder’s dream. The...

    • Posted October 4, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Hog Island Center for Enlightenment

    Finally there’s a place for men to feel the zen. JACKSON HOLE, WY – With an explosive growth in cool people projected in the greater Hog Island metro region, I have decided to get a step up...

    • Posted September 20, 2016
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  • REDNECK PERSPECTIVE: Westbank Wife Aspirations

    How a Hog Island sweetie infiltrated the barista bagel shop scene. JACKSON HOLE, WY – She stood in the dim light of my office doorway looking classy—Pearl Street bagel mug in hand, polar fleece jacket around her...

    • Posted September 6, 2016
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