WELL, THAT HAPPENED: When you own the world

By on April 29, 2015

An egotistical Tidal wave of failure care of musics biggest players
@AndrewMunz

well that

Jackson Hole, Wyoming – In a highly produced video released at the end of March, Coldplays Chris Martin, Daft Punk, Kanye West, Madonna, Rhianna, Beyonc and what seems like 20 other famous musicians gather in a room. Set up like some sort of United Nations diplomatic intervention, each artist is given a microphone at the circular table. As a viewer, I was instantly enthralled.

Have we cured cancer? I wondered. Is world hunger over?

Even Jay-Z states: We are changing the course of history.

Oh man, this must be good! Were alive at such an amazing moment!

And by the next frame, I realize how wrong I was.

Instead of these multi-millionaires pooling their resources for a noble global cause, they are coming together for a musical purpose. And it aint no AIDS benefit concert, folks.

If you are one of the 37 million people who stream music through services like Spotify and Pandora, you are on Jay-Zs shit list. Thats right. You are taking advantage of an artists musical mastery and using a service that only gets them $0.006 per stream.

As of the writing of this column, Beyoncs single Drunk in Love has had a total of 129,840,971 plays on Spotify since November 2014. So in six months at a rate of $0.006 per play, Beyonc only grossed a measly $779,045.83 on one of her songs. ONE SONG. Its clear the system is truly cheating these struggling artists.

This collaboration feels so egoless, Beyonc sighed in the video.

To battle this musical Armageddon, all of these icons have come together to create Tidal, described as the first ever artist-owned global music entertainment platform. Yes, with Tidal these artists are able to put their music on the Internet and earn way more money than Spotify would pay them. The artists claim that music should be purchased and valued and not discredited through various streaming services.

Ugh. I cant feel bad for millionaires, guys. I really cant.

Even with all the anti-Spotify and anti-Pandora propaganda Tidal has been spewing, subscriptions for those two platforms are up and Tidal is failing at a catastrophic rate. When the Tidal app officially debuted in March, it barely broke the Top 20 downloads in the iTunes Store. It has now fallen bellow the 700 mark. Pandora and Spotify are currently at the No. 3 and No. 4 spots, respectively.

There is nothing about Tidal that I find particularly interesting or innovative. To put it into perspective, if my favorite authors opened a bookstore, it does not mean I would stop frequenting the local bookstore Ive patronized for years. In this case, Spotify is an incredibly reliable program and the company has never fallen back on its product. To this day, I maintain that Spotifys premium service is the best $9.99 I spend every month. Not only does it introduce me to new music constantly, but also I am always playing and replaying my favorite songs.

If these artists really believe they’re getting gypped out of a fair share of cash, then they need to take it up with their own record labels and keep the consumer out of the fray. It is so frustrating that these idiots are belittling fans for streaming albums rather than purchasing them. It puts into question whether these artists are really in it for the increased exposure of what theyre creating, or if theyre more concerned about slipping off the Forbes Worlds Billionaires list. Whatever it is, despite what they claim, it sure isnt about the music. I shall enjoy watching Tidal dry up in the sand. An egoless collaboration… my ass.

Comments

comments


About Andrew Munz

You must be logged in to post a comment Login

Leave a Reply